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Douchebag Anthem
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To-Douche List
- 43. LMFAO
- 42. Derby Party Douche
- 41. You’re A Registered Voter in North Carolina
- 40. Collect ‘Em All, Bro!
- 39. How Many Ways Can You Qualify for The To-Douche List?
- 38. You Like Dubstep
- 37. You Don’t “Like” To-Douche List on Facebook
- 36. You Have the Douchebag Badge on Foursquare
- 35. Know Your Klout Score
- 34. Be Universally Condescending Whilst Riding a Fixie
- 33. Tom Brady. Next question.
- 32. Uhhhh … be this guy in public. Wait. I mean be this guy.
- 31. You Occupied Wall Street
- 30. You’re from Miami. Or LA. Or like Miami. Or LA.
- 29. The Pound-Hug is Your Standard Greeting
- 28. Get Aggro.
- 27. Sport These Dope-Ass Rims
- 26. Pump Your Fist, Arbitrarily, Sweatily
- 25. Your Favorite Bar Has Hair Gel in the Bathroom
- 24. Be Lebron James
- 23. Spray Tan Like A Mofo
- 22. TIE: Sunglasses on Back of Neck vs. Bluetooth in Public?
- 21. Drink Jagerbombs
- 20. Tip Poorly
- 19. And take photos in front of your mom’s bangin’ Swedish doll collection.
- 18. And Wear Your Hair Like This.
- 17. And Wear Headbands.
- 16. Wear Diamond Earrings. Period.
- 15. Think Maxim Magazine is Fresh, Son!
- 14. Get Your GTL On
- 13. Pose for Photos with Liquor Bottle(s)
- 12. If You Have to Wear A Shirt, You Have Three Choices
- 11. Wear A Visor
- 10. You’re Congressman Weiner
- 9. Post Facebook Updates About Your Workout
- 8. The Less Shirt, the Better. For Shizzle.
- 7. Wear a Flat Brim Hat
- 6. ALWAYS Stick Your Tongue Out. Especially in Photographs.
- 5. Pop Your Collar(s)
- 4. Wear A Thumb Ring
- 3. Your Name is Chad
- 2. Appear On ‘The Bachelorette’
- 1. Wear White Sunglasses
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